Animadversions.

The weblog of Joshua Drescher

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Okay Billy.

June 22nd, 2005 · No Comments · Art, Rants

Ladies and gentlemen, please stop what you’re doing and take note of the fact that mankind has achieved a new high watermark in delusional, megalomaniacal bullshit:

Fresh on the heels of the release of his first solo album, “TheFutureEmbrace,” Chicago rocker Billy Corgan says he’s breathing new life into an old dream: The Smashing Pumpkins.

In a full-page advertisement in today’s Chicago Tribune marking the release of the new CD, Corgan says, “For a year now I have walked around with a secret, a secret I chose to keep. But now I want you to be among the first to know that I have made plans to renew and revive The Smashing Pumpkins. I want my band back, and my songs, and my dreams.”

In the wake of an announcement of such MASSIVE import, questions abound:

Honestly, how completely self-absorbed do you have to be to TAKE OUT A FREAKING AD in a major newspaper to announce the fact that - for the good of the world - you’re getting your shitty post-grunge outfit back together?

Does he think we’ve been waiting breathlessly for the return of his underwhelmingly mediocre brand of moping and screaching to pop radio and that it’s ABSOLUTELY IMPERATIVE that we be made aware of his “secret plan” to reunite the Pumpkins IMMEDIATELY?

Is there any chance I could just watch Homer Simpson get shot with a cannonball instead?

For its part, the Tribune deserves credit for running a poll along with their article asking “Does Billy Corgan need to get over himself?” Sadly, fewer than half of those who answered responded affirmatively. I suppose there’s always a market for washed-up, pretentious nonsense.

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